Q: Who makes the best bougie condoms that smell/taste good and are still just as effective?

A: No one has ever managed to create a condom, bougie or otherwise, that tasted better than dick — and they’ve tried. But who knows? Someone might be out there working on a Tom-Holland-flavored condom right now.

Q: What’s the best way to deal with your own jealousy?

A: By remembering that jealousy isn’t a character failing — so long as it’s not being weaponized to control and/or terrorize, jealousy is a normal human emotion. Sometimes we can work through feelings of jealousy on our own, but at other times we need our partners to reassure us.

Q: I’m a woman who’s new to sending nudes. What do straight guys want when it comes to sexy pics?

A: Different straight guys want to see different things. If a straight guy asks you for pics and you feel safe sharing pics with that straight guy, ask him what he would like to see.

Q: I don’t have a foot fetish, but my honey does — no idea what they are looking for from me.

A: Your feet. 

Q: Uncut male here. My penis is dry — any causes/remedies?

A: I don’t wanna encourage straight men to wash their penises less than they already do… but you may be washing your penis too often, or using too harsh a soap when you do. Also, what kind of laundry detergent are you using? Try some new, gentler soaps in the shower and the laundry, and lightly apply a moisturizer (no alcohol, no acids) to your penis after you get out of the shower.

Q: Let’s say you’re a big shooter and you’re in a dark room and you’re about to blow your load. Where do you blow it?

A: If you’re a big shooter and you’re getting close and your cock isn’t in someone’s mouth or ass, you should — as a courtesy to others — point that thing at the floor, at the wall, or at yourself.

Q: Sharing sex toys — yay or nay?

A: Sex toys are expensive, landfills are overcrowded, and quality silicone sex toys can be dunked in a pot of boiling hot water or run through a dishwasher and sterilized.

Q: What should you eat if you want to be clean for a long, all-night bonkfest?

A: A dozen oysters a week in advance.

Q: I can squeeze out a gray/greenish liquid from my nipples. Is this normal?

A: Not unless you’re decomposing, in which case you have bigger problems than the goo leaking from your nipples. [Editor's note: The fine folks at Cleveland Clinic actually say that, if you're a woman, goo of most colors can be completely normal. Read more.]

Q: Poly here. How do I navigate having multiple partners I use the same honorific for?

A: My mom had five siblings, my dad had eight siblings — so the only way me and my siblings could let each other know which one of our aunts or uncles was coming for us was by including their first names with their honorifics: Aunt Peggy, Uncle Jimmy, Aunt Linda, Uncle Jerry, Aunt Sue, Uncle Walter, Aunt Judy, etc. 

So, I don’t see why you couldn’t go with Boyfriend Bob, Girlfriend Carol, Boyfriend Ted and Girlfriend Alice.

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